Home now. Drop dead exhausted,i wanna sleep but i can't.
5hours of sleep for 2days,felt so tempted just to swallow down those sleeping pills.
Sleep sleep sleep,don't have to face reality,face this pain ima going through.
Every minute seems to be a living hell.
Morning,went to elias,met honey for breakfast @ Macs.
Went over CC,did our work,she pei me study.
Afterwards,Amos came over.
He brought me & honey downstairs,told us we were going to go over to Polarbear's.
Didn't tell polarbear,like they told me to,i believed them,cos i thought they knew better.
Many things happened,quarrels & everything.
Stayed under polarbear's blk for an hour++
I really didn't know what to do,all i could do,was to control those tears from falling down my face..
Walked to West Plaza for drinks,den pei honey go ehub for her bbq chicken,we haven ate lunch.
No appetite,amos tried forcing me eat,suceeded in making me swallow 2 fries & a bite of chicken.
Bused back elias to get my card & HSH.
Thanks honey for treating me to: SuperDog,BBQ chicken & our Mac breakfast(:
& thanks to the both of you for walking me home & pei me for one whole day,sorry for troubling you 2.
I really dun wanna go school tmr.
Cos..Mrs See gonna kill me for not doing her maths + no mood attend lessons.
Fuck uhs,can't even pon class cans,after school still got maths _|_
I can't do my weekend assignment,cfm kena suan in class.
Lastly,sorrys to Aret.CTC,for not attending your chalet.
Thanks for inviting me,& hope you guys all enjoy yourselves[:
There is so,so much i wanna tell you.
So many things i need to explain,some things ain't what they seem to be.
I guess,i can only explain it all tmr,if i get to see you.
Missed you v.badly,i bet you didn't know.
But i need to tell you something.
I love you & i will never stop loving you.
You can choose not to believe me but..
Ima never gonna give up on you.
The day this r/s ends,is the day that you let me go & stop loving me.
Yes,we do have alot of problems.
But i can tolerate,already tolerating.
I can try my best,to salvage this,but you can't give up too.
I really really hope,we can talk this through tomorrow.
Cos,ima really not ready to say goodbye.
Complete loss. Hate me.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
BreakDown.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Life bloody sucks to the max at the moment.
I've reached the maximum i can tolerate.
Its been living hell since last night till now.
"Ignorance is bliss",ain't it true?
Slept for 2.5hours. Insonmia.
Ima big fool who should just keep me my big mouth shut.
Ima at a loss,somebody,please tell me what to do.
How much more hurt & disappointment i can take,i really don't know.
K,i should shut up & die right now.
Bye.
I've reached the maximum i can tolerate.
Its been living hell since last night till now.
"Ignorance is bliss",ain't it true?
Slept for 2.5hours. Insonmia.
Ima big fool who should just keep me my big mouth shut.
Ima at a loss,somebody,please tell me what to do.
How much more hurt & disappointment i can take,i really don't know.
K,i should shut up & die right now.
Bye.
Tell me if you still love me.
Cos i really don't know how to fix things back.
Losing faith in myself.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Peepo,ima home now.
Effing moodless laa! How how how??? )':
Yesterday thought i'd be home doing h/w tonight.
But..people asked me out. Honey & lovely!
& i went out,breaking my promise :C
Walked over to lovely's hse,den we walked to WS to get our stuff.
Saw childhood friend;pung mei lin :D
Went off shortly after cos honey needed someone pei her.
Bused to west plaza > Slacked at void deck while waiting > Walked to bus stop > Bused back to WS > Walked to ehub.
Waited so long for someone to come out,in the end bth.
Dinner w/honey @ SuperDog.
Songs played at superdog damn nice uhs,but too bad,we were in that mood.
Where i really dun wanna hear such songs,friggin hell.
In the end,both of us just sitting there,waiting & waiting like complete morons.
Bth the cold,so we both went out to the carpark there.
Sat there,did nothing except..more waiting & sitting down there quietly.
Ughz.
Gave up waiting & walked home,reached home around 9.45pm. Fcuk mans.
Long day,just full of waiting & waiting & waiting.
Now i think even polarbear oso pekcek,pissed w/me liaos.
Never knew i would miss you so bad.
Ughz. Think you oso dunno.
You still thought i was happy that you went camp,so i could do WHATEVER I WANTED.
Geez,so not the case.
2 more days,one more night.
Endurance test,shit it mans.
I'll be rotting at home tmr,most probably.
Don't really mind,kinda no mood go out.
Ima real tired now,energy all used up.
One last thing...
I REALLY ABHOR WAITING!
Effing moodless laa! How how how??? )':
Yesterday thought i'd be home doing h/w tonight.
But..people asked me out. Honey & lovely!
& i went out,breaking my promise :C
Walked over to lovely's hse,den we walked to WS to get our stuff.
Saw childhood friend;pung mei lin :D
Went off shortly after cos honey needed someone pei her.
Bused to west plaza > Slacked at void deck while waiting > Walked to bus stop > Bused back to WS > Walked to ehub.
Waited so long for someone to come out,in the end bth.
Dinner w/honey @ SuperDog.
Songs played at superdog damn nice uhs,but too bad,we were in that mood.
Where i really dun wanna hear such songs,friggin hell.
In the end,both of us just sitting there,waiting & waiting like complete morons.
Bth the cold,so we both went out to the carpark there.
Sat there,did nothing except..more waiting & sitting down there quietly.
Ughz.
Gave up waiting & walked home,reached home around 9.45pm. Fcuk mans.
Long day,just full of waiting & waiting & waiting.
Now i think even polarbear oso pekcek,pissed w/me liaos.
Never knew i would miss you so bad.
Ughz. Think you oso dunno.
You still thought i was happy that you went camp,so i could do WHATEVER I WANTED.
Geez,so not the case.
2 more days,one more night.
Endurance test,shit it mans.
I'll be rotting at home tmr,most probably.
Don't really mind,kinda no mood go out.
Ima real tired now,energy all used up.
One last thing...
I REALLY ABHOR WAITING!
Quick updates!
Ima home so early! Surprised ayes.
Well,school sucked in the morning.
Firstly,was late :@@@
Unfair shits,i was so NOT late,i was in time! Grrr!
But singh say school want us early in school,so cannot come IN TIME,must come EARLY _|_
So ima NOT late ley! Gahs,forget it.
Didn't wanna run,said i was sick.
In the end,tio 1hr detention.
Thats not all,Mrs See reported us cos a bunch of us pon her lesson yesterday.
Damn it,another 2 hours of detention -.-
BUT,detention ended an hour early! Aha! :D
Lessons were pretty okay though,physics damn cartoon! Hehs.
Laughed at our videos,LOL.
After school,bused home straight.
Guai bahs?
But ima gonna go out soon! Meet lovely,help her out w/something.
Polarbear,don't blame me for not keeping this promise ><
Cos i kept the one to flood your inbox <:
Replying tags before i chiong out,late once more! :C
Tag Replies:
Well,school sucked in the morning.
Firstly,was late :@@@
Unfair shits,i was so NOT late,i was in time! Grrr!
But singh say school want us early in school,so cannot come IN TIME,must come EARLY _|_
So ima NOT late ley! Gahs,forget it.
Didn't wanna run,said i was sick.
In the end,tio 1hr detention.
Thats not all,Mrs See reported us cos a bunch of us pon her lesson yesterday.
Damn it,another 2 hours of detention -.-
BUT,detention ended an hour early! Aha! :D
Lessons were pretty okay though,physics damn cartoon! Hehs.
Laughed at our videos,LOL.
After school,bused home straight.
Guai bahs?
But ima gonna go out soon! Meet lovely,help her out w/something.
Polarbear,don't blame me for not keeping this promise ><
Cos i kept the one to flood your inbox <:
Replying tags before i chiong out,late once more! :C
Tag Replies:
;cc
Ahahas! Like you said,SUPPOSED^^
;Vicso
Hellooo! Will tag you soon! K? Promise :D
;SEBRINA
Hehs,which one? Sexybitch?
;sihui
Hehs,i pon cos dun feel like going mahs :/ I occasionally naughty abit luhs :P I dun really believe in everything it says. Say my character,from the horoscope,some really pretty accurrate! But predict future not de. Hahas,i will takecare! Ty :D
;LOVELY.,
Ohno,ima late in meeting you! Gahs. YOU TRICIA LIM YAN LING pretty one okies! Trust me~! No lo,me TAN SI YING then the ugly one! :B
;clayton
Hehs! Ima growing up at last! v^^V
Changes never cease to amaze me.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Seriously think life is full of never ending changes,unexpected twists & turns,don't cha think so?
Makes me feel that some things are so fragile,easily broken.
K..that was random ><
Went back to school today,didn't wanna go but no choice :C
Mr Ng came to find honey & me,threaten us w/detention -.-
Lessons were sucha bore,basically just talking to honey all the way.
Got punished in SS class,lame shits.
Alvin came to find us at ehub,we played a game of "hide & seek" with him ><
Somehow feel kinda guilty now :/
Gahs.
Walked over to WS,den to void decks.
Got extremely wet & cold cos got caught in the rain. Again -.-
Walked back to WS,slacked at library,reading the silly horoscope books honey bought & made me buy too x.x
Walked home in the rain afterwards,while talking to polarbear on phone,LOL.
Did some homework just now,ima guai kid nowadays i think :B
Got home early,as promised to polarbear^^
4 days of not meeting him,endurance test?
Ahahas,will meet him on sunday,hopefully[:
Meanwhile,takecare of yourself in camp luhs.
Always get sick one ley you,bu hui zhao gu zi ji! 18 year old baby hor?
Oh! Lastly..heres wishing malvin lee;source of light a happy 15th birthday :DDD
Ps forgot in the afternoon & couldn't celebrate w/you all.
Hope you enjoyed yourself(:
I learnt,not to be greedy.
Not to have my hopes up too high,but instead to be satisfied with what i have now.
Life is ever changing,who knows what could happen tomorrow right?
What will be,will be.
If i take one step at a time,i won't fall *smiles*
Makes me feel that some things are so fragile,easily broken.
K..that was random ><
Went back to school today,didn't wanna go but no choice :C
Mr Ng came to find honey & me,threaten us w/detention -.-
Lessons were sucha bore,basically just talking to honey all the way.
Got punished in SS class,lame shits.
Pon-ed maths extra lesson & remedial,cos simply no mood to deal with it.
Mrs See gonna kill us on monday x.x
Bused to ehub,lunched at superdog.
Honey & me did our h/w,we play hard but work hard too okies(;
Talked about stuff too,somehow i was once on her boat.
Don't worry,i understand what you mean.
Anything can just gimme a call or text me.
Cos you've been there for me these few months,i'll definitely do the same for you.Alvin came to find us at ehub,we played a game of "hide & seek" with him ><
Somehow feel kinda guilty now :/
Gahs.
Walked over to WS,den to void decks.
Got extremely wet & cold cos got caught in the rain. Again -.-
Walked back to WS,slacked at library,reading the silly horoscope books honey bought & made me buy too x.x
Walked home in the rain afterwards,while talking to polarbear on phone,LOL.
Did some homework just now,ima guai kid nowadays i think :B
Got home early,as promised to polarbear^^
4 days of not meeting him,endurance test?
Ahahas,will meet him on sunday,hopefully[:
Meanwhile,takecare of yourself in camp luhs.
Always get sick one ley you,bu hui zhao gu zi ji! 18 year old baby hor?
Oh! Lastly..heres wishing malvin lee;source of light a happy 15th birthday :DDD
Ps forgot in the afternoon & couldn't celebrate w/you all.
Hope you enjoyed yourself(:
I learnt,not to be greedy.
Not to have my hopes up too high,but instead to be satisfied with what i have now.
Life is ever changing,who knows what could happen tomorrow right?
What will be,will be.
If i take one step at a time,i won't fall *smiles*
Running away.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Home > West Plaza > Void Decks > Home > Polarbear's > Republic Poly > Causeway point > Polarbear's > Elias > Home
(Places went today,omg)
Long long day for me today,have been out since 6.40am :x
Was in school uniform,with school bag & all already.
But then,i made up my mind to pon school.
Seriously totally moodless to go,plus received honey's phone call at 5.45am -.-
Many things happened,needed to meet her too.
Called polarbear to tell him i not going school.
Walked over,just felt like walking,reached west plaza at 7am.
Received polarbear's text saying he won't be going school either.
So 4 of us met up at West Plaza,LOL.
Lots of things happened,think we all talked too loud :x
Slacked there,JunAn came & we went off to void decks.
Honey helped me call school,lmao.
She followed me back to my house,for me to bathe & change while she slept like a log!
Wake her up only,i tio scolded x.x
Bused over to polarbear's.
Pei honey wait for her bus home,den took bus.
Thanks alot honey for pei-ing me today,luv you tons <3
It rained kinda heavily,so both me & polarbear was caught in the rain ><
Met up with his friends @ Causeway Point,den transfered bus to RP.
1st time go in poly,omg..so much nicer than secondary school cans!
Got his lappy fixed,den went to Causeway Point again for lunch.
Ate porridge,ahas!
Bused back to his house there,damn tired :/
So all i did in his house was seriously like pig x.x
Watched tv & slept,basically,hahas!
Actually..is TRY to sleep,but CANNOT sleep cos somebody keep disiao me uhs ._.
Oh! & did some quizzes,with him watching all my answers,bleahs.
Some answers v.accurate,but some NOT!
Left for elias around 6pm.
Did my english summary! So proud of myself ayes! ^^V
Left for home around 9.30pm.
Long day,was tired but then,enjoyed it way better than school :DDD
Not looking forward to school tmr *sighs*
But forced to go,its been so long since i went school,missed out on so many lessons already ><
Shit it. Got to study my ass off tomorrow!
Promised myself to work harder,got to do it.
Won't be meeting polarbear for the next 4days oso,gahs ):
So i guess i'll just be a guai kia & study,hehs.
(Places went today,omg)
Long long day for me today,have been out since 6.40am :x
Was in school uniform,with school bag & all already.
But then,i made up my mind to pon school.
Seriously totally moodless to go,plus received honey's phone call at 5.45am -.-
Many things happened,needed to meet her too.
Called polarbear to tell him i not going school.
Walked over,just felt like walking,reached west plaza at 7am.
Received polarbear's text saying he won't be going school either.
So 4 of us met up at West Plaza,LOL.
Lots of things happened,think we all talked too loud :x
Slacked there,JunAn came & we went off to void decks.
Honey helped me call school,lmao.
She followed me back to my house,for me to bathe & change while she slept like a log!
Wake her up only,i tio scolded x.x
Bused over to polarbear's.
Pei honey wait for her bus home,den took bus.
Thanks alot honey for pei-ing me today,luv you tons <3
It rained kinda heavily,so both me & polarbear was caught in the rain ><
Met up with his friends @ Causeway Point,den transfered bus to RP.
1st time go in poly,omg..so much nicer than secondary school cans!
Got his lappy fixed,den went to Causeway Point again for lunch.
Ate porridge,ahas!
Bused back to his house there,damn tired :/
So all i did in his house was seriously like pig x.x
Watched tv & slept,basically,hahas!
Actually..is TRY to sleep,but CANNOT sleep cos somebody keep disiao me uhs ._.
Oh! & did some quizzes,with him watching all my answers,bleahs.
Some answers v.accurate,but some NOT!
Left for elias around 6pm.
Did my english summary! So proud of myself ayes! ^^V
Left for home around 9.30pm.
Long day,was tired but then,enjoyed it way better than school :DDD
Not looking forward to school tmr *sighs*
But forced to go,its been so long since i went school,missed out on so many lessons already ><
Shit it. Got to study my ass off tomorrow!
Promised myself to work harder,got to do it.
Won't be meeting polarbear for the next 4days oso,gahs ):
So i guess i'll just be a guai kia & study,hehs.
Didn't get to sleep at all last night,
Memories haunted me _|_
Sometimes,i feel ima more alone than ever.
But then,i got to keep remembering this.
I still have you by my side,no matter what right?
Shouldn't let those shit bring me down.
I should stop running away now.
Stay strong.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
*Can't upload pics cos mom took my camera,need develop pics :x
Morning all(:
Think most of you in school when ima posting this :/
Was getting ready for school,when headache got worse & worse.
So dad told me rest at home,no school.
Think ima gonna die tomorrow ><
Cos..i missed both sessions of financial literacy
& i got no MC for today,only letter.
Ughz,shit it.
Guess i'll be rotting at home today :C
Yesterday:
Was late to school w/lovely,
School made us run 2 rounds _|_
I'd rather detention (cos i'll just skip it)
Lessons were okies,enjoyed chem practical.
Lunch w/lovely at fish & co.
Pei her slack at my area cos of heavy rain.
Lovely,i good to you one okies :B
Home then out again to meet polarbear(:
Watched finish that show,funny parts made me laugh,hahas!
Finished english comprehensions v^^v
Went to slack,HSH afterwards.
Morning all(:
Think most of you in school when ima posting this :/
Was getting ready for school,when headache got worse & worse.
So dad told me rest at home,no school.
Think ima gonna die tomorrow ><
Cos..i missed both sessions of financial literacy
& i got no MC for today,only letter.
Ughz,shit it.
Guess i'll be rotting at home today :C
Yesterday:
Was late to school w/lovely,
School made us run 2 rounds _|_
I'd rather detention (cos i'll just skip it)
Lessons were okies,enjoyed chem practical.
Lunch w/lovely at fish & co.
Pei her slack at my area cos of heavy rain.
Lovely,i good to you one okies :B
Home then out again to meet polarbear(:
Watched finish that show,funny parts made me laugh,hahas!
Finished english comprehensions v^^v
Went to slack,HSH afterwards.
